An older, white haired man walked into a jewelry store one Friday evening with a beautiful young gal at his side. He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend.
The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000 ring and showed it to him. The old man said, “I don’t think you understand, I want something very special.”
At that statement, the jeweler went to his special stock and brought another ring over. “Here’s a stunning ring at only $40,000,” the jeweler said. The young lady’s eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with excitement. The old man seeing this said, “We’ll take it.”
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Posted by limpek |
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An elderly couple was driving across the country. While the woman was behind the wheel, the couple was pulled over by the highway patrol.
“Ma’am, did you know you were speeding?” the officer said.
The woman, hard of hearing, turned to her husband and asked, “What did he say?”
“He said you were speeding!” the old man yelled.
The patrolman then asked, “May I see your license?”
The woman turned to her husband again, “What did he say?”
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Three men, two younger, and one senior citizen were sitting naked in a sauna.
Suddenly there was a beeping sound. The young man pressed his forearm and the beep stopped. The others looked at him questioningly. “That was my pager” he said “I have a microchip under the skin of my arm”.
A few minutes later, a phone rang. The second young man lifted his palm to his ear. When he had finished he explained “That was my mobile phone. I have a microchip in my hand”.
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A guy is in his late 30 and still not married but has a steady girlfriend.
One day, his mother decided to ask his girl friend for dinner at home. Eager to test her, the mother asked her to come in 3 hours early and prepared ingredients for her to cook.
His girl friend not knowing what is going to happen is surprised to see all the ingredients such as seafood ready.
Staring at the mother, she whispered a low sigh saying she cannot cook.
Frustrated, the mother brought in all the dry laundry and asked her to iron and fold the clothes.
Again she she did the same thing.
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Four brothers left home for college, and they became successful doctors and lawyers and prospered.
Some years later, they chatted after having dinner together. They discussed the gifts they were able to give their elderly mother who lived far away in another city.
The first said, “I had a big house built for Mama.”
The second said, ” I had a hundred thousand dollar theater built in the house.”
The third said, “I had my Mercedes dealer deliver an SL600 to her.”
The fourth said, “You know how Mama loved reading the Bible and you know
she can’t read anymore because she can’t see very well. I met this preacher who told me about a parrot that can recite the entire bible. It took twenty preachers 12 years to teach him. I had to pledge to contribute $100,000 a year for twenty years to the church, but it was worth it. Mama just has to name the chapter and verse and the parrot will recite it.”
The other brothers were impressed.
After the holidays Mom sent out her Thank You notes.
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